I have been missing you all so! Getting the opportunity to share little bits and pieces of my life, inspirations, etc is always a wonderful outlet that brightens my day. I miss having the time to read all of your blogs as well! I'm not usually this personal on here but I feel the need to share so... Here's the update: School has taken over a little more that expected, and the Etsy has been more successful (and kept me much busier) than I originally imagined (not that I'm complaining by any means!) It's been fun, for the most part, but not at all easy. As far as school goes, my classes are hard, really hard, but I'm actually doing very well. Paying for the classes, has been a nightmare. I was offered a Pell Grant, and student loans, then denied the student loans because the school made a mistake by offering them to me (some blah blah blah about not having enough hours through one specific program.) I have done everything I can to add the hours, or whatever it would take to resolve the problem, there just is no solution for this semester. Without the loans, my husband and I have to make it by on his minimum wage job (he's working as a first year electricians apprentice and is in electrical school), what little I do make from my Etsy store, and what he can make extra by mowing lawns. Sadly the extra from mowing lawns on the weekend will soon come to an end as fall and winter are quickly approaching. The rest we need to survive, we have to borrow from family. I'm not complaining, I'm very thankful for every day and the opportunities and help we are blessed with. It just hasn't been easy. It just seems that "when it rains, it pours!" (and our case "poors") ;) My husband's transmission on his truck went out as well, which would set us back a few grand, if it was even feasible for us to attempt to fix it. I was contemplating quitting school to go back into Real Estate, hoping to help make enough money to get us by. I'm just really scared about if the timing is right, and hate to throw away all I've invested time and money wise into getting my degree. I feel as if I'm at a cross road, not knowing what lies left or to the right, and having NO IDEA which way to go. I'm afraid of failure. For now, I have decided to finish out the semester since the schooling is paid for. And since I have a family blessed and loving enough to help support us. (I have NO idea what I would do without my parents. They don't always understand. But they always listen and are truly my best friends.) It's just really hard to accept their help at this point in my life. It breaks my heart to feel like a finical burden on them still, being that I am 24 and married. Hopefully things will begin to look up, and the future will at some point become more clear. My husband and I are just thankful everyday for all the blessings, love and support we are surrounded by in our lives.
(And All of you being part of that too!) I have really appreciated all of the support and help and listening hearts I have found through my friends on here, especially Leah. My friends from home have been a lot of help too. It means a lot to me to have such supportive, understanding friends even when they are dealing with struggles of their own. Last night as my husband and I made our way to bed, the only thing I have hung on my wall, (I haven't hung much in hopes my husband will repaint our bedroom), happens to be next to my bed and really caught my attention. It is a framed version of the Serenity prayer we were given as a wedding present. I had read it several times before, but it had never meant more to me than it did last night. I shared it via text with my closest friends before falling asleep, and want to share it with you now. It helps me get through the day, maybe it will be able to do the same for someone that happens to read this!
God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.
Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
as it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right
if I surrender to His Will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life
and supremely happy with Him
Forever in the next.